I LOVE road trips! When I hit the open road I feel a sense of freedom that I just can’t experience anywhere else. It’s so exciting to map out the route, book the lodging, and search ahead for landmarks to see and places to eat. In other words, my travels are pretty well thought out before take-off.
It’s not quite as easy to plan a spiritual journey. Mine started off with a wholehearted search for God, and months of reflection. I was determined to understand how (or why) I fell in love with alcohol.
In the awkward years of adolescence, my childhood innocence vanished (without explanation) and was replaced with the dreadful practice of measuring my “worth” by my appearance and popularity. I felt awful, and was certain that I looked awful (hated those pimples!).
Quite frankly, I wished I would disappear. It seemed to work, actually. Many grammar schools had melded into the seventh grade, and somewhere in that transition, I became invisible. I did not fit in.
It’s almost surreal. Four decades (and a lot of haze) later, I still remember those days clearly and can visualize myself observing the others. Always on the outside, looking in. It was like being the star of a screenplay, with no script, and no director. With the spotlight on and cameras rolling, there I was… lost, cheeks blushing with embarrassment. It was my time to shine, and I had stage fright!
The very first drink I took fixed everything. I was no longer tongue-tied. I felt comfortable in my own skin. I was courageous! I began writing my OWN lines, and was thrilled to take center stage.
That’s a pretty fair and accurate synopsis of how my relationship with the bottle began.
When you journal about your life (or tell a story in REAL TIME), it becomes apparent quite quickly that there are always twists, the plot is constantly changing, mistakes happen, or (as we all know) setbacks occur.
While preparing this post, I went through the pages of my past, and did the old cut and paste trick, editing as needed. I turned my outdated piece into something more applicable for TODAY, yet kept it authentic. As I thought about this, it occurred to me what a wonderful message could be conveyed-
It’s never too late to rewrite your story.
Next Up: Author of My Life